During an afternoon walk,
I spent the last few minutes
Gathering leaves from the
Wooded path, already
Painted by Autumn's
Vibrant hand,
The rain scented wind
Laced with a slight
Chill, Fall is around
The corner waiting to
Make her grand entrance
With bold, wild colors.

It has been a whirl wind week with getting back into the classroom, meeting my new students, therefore, this weekend I took some time for myself. This time has given me breathing space to come back tomorrow recharged for the challenges and wonderful happy times that lay ahead of me this week.

Friday evening I went for my daily walk at the park. I made a commitment to myself to walk for my health, daily; almost two months ago I began to walk at the park, making it something to get through. I wasn't used to the hills I had to trudge or other terrain. Now I am walking up to 35 minutes daily and find that it is a respite from daily endeavors, an activity I look forward to and not just something I get through. I walk at a pretty quick pace but at the same time engage all my senses to my surroundings. I find that I come into an acute awareness of the environment at that time. The walks I take allows for time in a busy day to find quiet solitude.

During this time I clear my mind. The endless thoughts circling in my mind cease. I first concentrate on my breath, footsteps, feeling the ground beneath my feet. Once it is only the breath and foot fall, then I expand to feel the breeze on my face, blowing my hair, the sound of traffic, birds flying overhead or sitting in a tree singing it's beautiful melody, children on the playground playing, hearing their laughter, squeals of delight, or the tired fussy child who wants to go home, the little league football teams playing and practicing, the loud cheers of parents, coaches yelling encouragement, or demanding the children play better, to get it together. I also hear water splashing from the indoor pool, shrieks from swimmers, the smell of chlorine, laced, mixed, and mingled with the smell of pine trees, flowers, the small rose garden, the scent of different people as they pass me on the trail. Also I tune into the fading sunlight as it penetrates the canopy of trees that I am under, light dancing on the path. Simultaneously I am aware of what is going on with me, my body, and inside of me. I know when I must push myself, picking up speed, the feel of my heart pumping nourishing blood through my body, the tingle and burn I feel in my legs, from ankle to thigh. Every one of my senses accosted while I am in tune to the whole of it. During and after my walks I am blissed out.

When I'm finished, I drive back to my house, go to the gazebo with my journal to write. Combining the quiet solitude of the walk and time in the gazebo, all the while surrounded by beautiful nature, thoughts pour out of me. During those times I have listened to the voice within myself.

In the quiet, a phrase keeps coming to me: Living Whole Heart and Soul. At first I was just given the thought of Living Whole. I began to think about what living whole means. What does living whole mean to me, in my life? Living Whole in my mind has now evolved to Living Whole Heart and Soul. Right now in my life I know living whole heart and soul means engaging in things that nourish me from the inside and outside. Quiet time daily seems to effect even the most smallest aspects of my life. I feel as if something is missing if I have not had quiet time during the day. It is elusive at first then I think well I haven't spent time really listening to the silence today, whether that turns into daily prayer, meditation, or just sitting with the silence. Daily exercise of my body engages and helps my whole being. I know that abiding by an organic, vegetarian way of life also nourishes me. I have moved closer to veganism and a raw diet that is low in sodium, carbs, and cholesterol. I feel as if I have more energy and vitality when eating this way. Daily prayer, meditation, and visualization also enriches my way of life. I read daily also. Along with this, writing in any form, occasionally painting and drawing, lets my creative side speak. To balance all the solitary activities I also find time to socialize with family and friends. I also know that growing up an only child makes it easier for me to relish in solitary quiet time and that some social situations make me withdraw, overwhelm me, and wish for smaller groups of people. Laughter is my daily dose of medicine.

This idea: Living Whole Heart and Soul has anchored in me, resonates within me in a deep place. This idea is taking flight and feeding my creative ideas that are flowing.

The vacation to the beach was fun. I had a good time there. I am in constant awe of Mother Nature and the beauty that surrounds us daily. Nature is a gift given to us from God, a vision of miracles that only He could create.

While on vacation there was a balance of resting on the beach in the sunlight reading, writing, and walking, along with going out to see history that surrounds the area of St. Augustine. I went to the Spanish Market that is filled with restaurants, art galleries, boutiques, folk art shops. It was fantastic there. I went to a couple of cathedrals there which were breath taking beautiful. I also wrote a few poems while at the beach:

My hair combed
By the wind, scented
With salt of the sea

___________________________

Sand bar full of
Shells, thrown up from
Seas' inside, born to the
Sun from darkness to light
Like the lotus
Leaves the mud and muck
To emerge into sunlight
Watching day born from night
___________________________


Ocean
Wild
A mind of it's own
Free thinker
Reacts on every whim
___________________________

It was refreshing to walk on the beach, sand beneath and between my toes, the cold water lapping at my feet, the sun warming my body.

Christina at Soul Aperture http://soulaperture.blogspot.com/ is hosting the simple things that make us happy on July 8th. I am posting early. Thank you Christina for your constant inspiration, it means the world to me.

All the simple things that bring joy, add to a monumental thing called life. I love that life is made up of all the simple things that bring pleasure and joy. I am loving the extra time that I am getting to spend reading in the gazebo. The gazebo is surrounded by flowers in full bloom, trees, bird feeders with a large amount of birds and squirrels visiting. I love to be in nature, watching the sunset with all of my senses engaged to the world around me. I love every evening sitting in nature reading, contemplating, and sharing some time with a stray cat that I have been feeding for several weeks now. She is a black and white tuxedo cat and she will sit in the grass in the fading sun while I read, she naps, stretches lazily, naps again, but at the same time she seems to be keenly aware of everything going on around her. I am abundantly thankful for the precious, fun life I have been given.

This morning my alarm clock was the sun tickling my face softly with it's warm rays as I slowly woke up, smiling. I love waking up naturally like this. I lay in bed watching the tree limbs laden with green leaves sway in the breeze making sunlight dance across the ceiling and walls. Then after I was fully awake I had some cereal with soy milk, a half cup of blueberries, and a banana. I ate this while writing in my journal and listening to the WAH! cd. I feel a balance in my life that I want to sustain not just while I am off from work, but maintain this in the long term. This balance, cohesion, and synchronicity comes from my core, the core of my being - I can feel it that strongly. I feel anchored and grounded yet I feel a vibrant flow coursing through me. I love this feeling. This balance is not temporary, I am not limiting myself, this will be a lasting aspect of my life. I am abundantly thankful.

Yesterday I thought endlessly of my elderly cousin who is now in her mid 80s. She talks about the past, her past, a lot, almost living there and it makes me sad. I can't define the sadness, if it is for her because she is stuck there, or if thinking that one day that could be me sitting there talking about the glory days of the past, my past, when I'm well into my 80 years of life. Anyway, I had to purge these thoughts out in this poem.

She gazes at her
Gnarled past sitting
On the table; quick glances
Is all she can take, steal;
She used to think of it
As a ribbon, stretched out, smooth,
Thrown carelessly onto
A surface, curves and
Elegant folds, twists
After decades now she
Sees rough knots curled
Onto one another
Zigzag roads end abruptly
Only to eventually begin again
Then just in another direction
Others long, drawn out
Then giving way to a different path
Knobby contorted choices made,
Decisions led back to its source
Herself.

Thank you Christina, at Soul Aperture, http://soulaperture.blogspot.com/ for your wonderful idea of posting what makes us happy and grateful. There are so many things that make me happy and grateful. As I was writing and thinking about this topic I noticed that most of the things that make me happy are non material items. I love that and want to make sure that I live my life more from my heart and soul, rather than a materialistic aspect. I look forward to reading every one's ideas.
I am happy and grateful for:

this glorious life I have been given to live

God

parents

friends - L, R, M, C, J, G, J, R

memories of my cat, Maya, who passed a few months back

writing poetry

writing short stories

reading

praying

authenticity

honesty/truth

meditating

art

talks on the phone with friends late into the night (haven't done this in a long time, but still love it)

laughing and laughter

listening to music - I'm really loving Natasha Beddingfield, Wah!, Norah Jones, some other Sanskrit cds, Cold Play, the list could go on and on about the music that makes me happy

teaching 5 year old children

children

laughter of children and their carefree spirits and ideas

laughing

soy peppermint mochas and hazelnut lattes

reading on a rainy day

reading in the sunshine

everyday in nature

sitting in the gazebo watching the sunset

hearing bird's song

watching birds fly, soaring free in the blue sky

feeling the breeze on my face

feeling the sun warm my face

sitting in a window when it is a winter day with the sun warming me

hot chocolate

walking barefoot in the grass

feeling the dew on my bare feet

sand on bare feet

the beach

painting

painting a canvas full of vibrant colors

dancing

chai tea

in bookstores, finding a comfy seat, a good book, and good latte

autumn/fall

Sunday afternoons

soup

Rumi poems

the mountains

staying up late

sleeping late

curling up with a good book or my journal in a blanket on a rainy, cool day

walking in nature

Mexican food, any food that is hot, salty, and spicy

peaches, pears, clementines

going to parks and walking the wooded trails, being in nature

sitting in my gazebo at dusk in the summer with candles going, their scent mixing with the scent of nature is yummy

learning new things daily

open to new possibilities and experiences that expand horizons

traveling on the path, the journey of my life, embracing all that comes my way

smiling

sunlight glittering off the green leaves of spring and summer

antique browsing and antique shopping, knowing each object has a history - interesting and intriguing

delving into getting to know myself daily, this is an ongoing process that never ceases

popcorn, chips, and salsa

animals

architecture

old houses

gardens and botanical gardens

the scent Warm Vanilla Sugar from Bath and Body Works

Japanese maple trees, especially in the fall

flowers: especially lilies - bright fiery orange lilies, lotus, jonquils, buttercups, daisies, sunflowers, and jasmine

the scent of lavender

Vincent Van Gogh's paintings

Italian Renaissance art and architecture

apricot jam

the smell of rain

smell of burning leaves in the autumn

stationary, pens, pencils, crayons, that new smell of them all

hearing children read for the first time, stringing slowly that first sentence, connecting it then realizing they have read, so rewarding

manicures and pedicures

horses

optimistic people

jazz music of the 1920s, 1930s, and 1940s, the flapper era - I think that is a time when a lot of people found their creative nature and let those talents shine - a very carefree bohemian time in history

From making this list of the things that make me happy, I find it is the simple things that do bring me happiness and joy. Once we know our true nature, what makes our heart's sing with happiness and joy, our true self, our true heart and soul, what lies in us that surpasses, our body, mind, emotions, feelings, in finding the essence of who we are, this will allow us to have lasting happiness and ultimate joy.

Love, peace, joy, light, happiness, and truth to all!

Out of the cosmic
Womb of God
Is birthed
Light and love,
Peace and compassion -
From God, creator
Of all things

In the womb of
Creativity
We soar
Out of the
Light of
God's cosmic
Creation,
His body of
Word and knowledge

After a hard workout,
Blood pumping vibrantly
Hot through my veins,
Sweat coating my face
I smile and feel
Gratefully alive
Filled with joy

I invited the night
Full of stars
To dance through
My window
Serenading me
With the first
Song of insects
All senses accosted
As I smell
The burst
Of flower's
Bloom
Tasting it's
Sweet nectar
On my lips

Every day is fantastic, but I had an especially marvelous day yesterday, actually an overall marvelous weekend. I usually don't use the word marvelous, but the day was just that. There is nothing like spending time outside in nature! My mother and I planted banana pepper plants that will give us peppers in about 6-8 weeks. Having my hands in the dirt, digging, planting, watering the newly planted peppers and other flowers, being accousted by all of nature was intoxicating. Every year around this time there is also a jazz festival in our town. I live close to the downtown area so I could hear the jazz music while I planted. The sun was glistening off freshly green leaves of trees, the grass shimmered, swayed, and danced in the spring breeze. The only way I could describe my day in the sun, in nature, working with the flowers and plants was that I was blissed out last night. I could not focus on anything I was so light headed, dreamy, peaceful, full of love, happiness, peace, and compassion, and one with myself. I felt the fusion of my mind, body, and spirit.

When I felt this melding of mind, body, heart, soul, spirit, I thought again of how we are always whole, always connected to one another, connected to all living things, to all things, but there are only glimpses in which we recognize this truth. I want to hold onto the knowing, the truth of this, cherish this knowledge, revere, and respect, it, hold it gently to my heart, then release, sending it out to everyone. When I think of this, I have a vision of myself capturing something like star dust, cupping it in my hand, then blowing, seeing the star dust, float on the breeze, spreading to everything, scattering peace, love, and compassion.

Thank you so much Amber at Sweatpea's Corner blog: http://sweetpeazcorner.blogspot.com/ This is such a pretty award and such an honor to be recognized.

Day 16, 17, and 18 of the 37 Day Challenge:
Yesterday I finished reading The Pull of the Moon by Elizabeth Berg. This was a truly wonderful book to read. The woman in the novel, Nan, ran away from home at the age of 50. She decided to take a road trip by herself, without her husband of 25 years, without her daughter who was in college, and without any friends, she just took this trip on her own for a few weeks. Some parts of the book are absolutely breath taking. Berg writes with a true, authentic voice, says what many people may think, have thought, and experienced. She says at one point in a letter to her husband about her trip, "I know my own luck. I know how rare it is for a person to be able to do this. And I know more and more what I'm doing it for. I feel a kind of strength starting to happen that is wholly legitimate, that is not some trapping I wear until it falls off. It is as though the thing has roots, and seeks the sun with its face turned toward it. And I know I never would have found it without leaving." I think that people can do little things for themselves daily so they do not take such a drastic measure as to go on a road trip by themselves for almost a month like Nan in the novel did. Sometimes we have to leave ourselves to find our own true authentic self. When I'm in nature, write, paint, read, teach, help others, I come out of myself and leave "me" behind, and in that I find myself.

Days 13, 14, 15 of the 37 Day Challenge:
On Monday and Tuesday it snowed, so Wednesday through today, we have had typical early spring weather. I have been out and about enjoying these gorgeous days, whether it was sitting in the window seat on windy chilly Wednesday at Borders, drinking a hot chai tea, writing, driving to the lake to look at spring flourishing all around me, sitting in the gazebo in my backyard in the evening, or antique shopping yesterday, and afterward eating at the Varsity. Being in nature is a balm for my soul. I have been graciously waking with a smile on my face each and every morning as the sun wakes me. Also I have been writing a poem a day. This is the poem from yesterday:

I hunger for the
Sunlight of Spring
To spread itself
Endlessly
From sunrise -
To twilight
With the glorious
Sounds of birdsong,
Wind whispering
It's rustle through
New greenery, hearing
The pop as flowers
Bloom into raucous
Vibrant colors
A beauty only
God could create

Day 12 of the 37 Day Challenge:
Today on April 7th it is snowing in Georgia. It is gorgeous here. The wind is blowing too hard for the snow to accumulate, but it is beautiful flying around. So I am in a happy, peaceful place right now, drinking mocha, listening to WAH!, watching the snow fall, reading, writing.

Day 11 of 37 Day Challenge:
I went with my family to the mountains for the day. This is a place that my parents took me as a child; the first time we went on a family vacation was when I was three years old. I traveled with them the same roads we had taken many times before to this place that holds so many memories for me. At one point yesterday we walked beside the river with snowflakes sticking lightly in our hair and misting our face. It was a beautiful day which I am thankful for.

Day 10 Sunday:

I could wake
Everyday to
Sunlight
Flooding through
My bedroom
Windows
Caressing me
With warmth

Day 9 Saturday:
My writing is changing. I've had this feeling for about six or seven months now. I don't see myself as rigid as I used to be in my writing. There is a revolution in writing, a new freedom, but it is elusive and I can't quiet define what has changed in it, other than it is different, and I feel great about this. So this is a poem where I am trying to figure out what is going on with it.

I started wandering
With words,
Not a metaphor,
Or similie,
Something in between
Without definition
Uniting of truth
Creating simplicity
A wonderful way
To write and live
A life comfortably.

Day 8 Friday:

Spring makes
Me hungry
For the youth
Of my early twenties
Nostalgia
Sweet and bitter
Like the pungent
Scent of flowers
In bloom
Not able to hide
Their vibrant
Brilliant colors,
Splashes of hues that
Delight the senses,
Obscures inner beauty
That slowly grows into
It's own and emerges.