Morning
Made beautiful
By cold, watery
Sunshine reflecting
Off trees, dew
Bright, glittering
Jewels
A lone hawk's squawk
Echoes
Breaking Winter's
Silence

I wrote this poem the other day when I was a little under the weather:

Some days I feel
I move in shadows,
A shadow of myself -
Who I am is concealed
Never revealed
I want to live my
Life in vibrant color!

Today with the sun shining bright and the air crisp I counter the poem above with this one just written:

Embrace self
All that has flowered,
Is flowering,
Or ever will flower,
Is grace,
Surrounded by grace,
Peace within

A stream from the
Light of life -
God
Flows through
All,
Sacred roots
Run deep are
Nourished with love

Thank you Christina for inviting us to participate in The Simple Things! You are such an inspiration!

I stumbled across these wise words by Maya Angelou the other day and her phrase spoke to my heart: "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." This phrase makes me very thankful for the simple act of writing. I love to write, from writing poetry, to short stories, long stories, and everything in between.

So let me start the list of simple things that make my heart sing and my soul dance by adding writing at the very top of the list, along with:

long walks in nature
my kitten Mocha
reading
Autumn and all of her colorful spelendor
beautiful sun shine
blue skies of Autumn
crunchy leaves
rain, the sound of rain
thunderstorms
hazelnut lattes
soy decaf peppermint mochas
Borders bookstore
vegetable soup
pumpkin lattes
pumpkin soup
curling up in blankets reading a good book
classical music
dancing to pop music
teaching children
laughter of children
friends
family
laughing so hard that I snort
watching a good movie
music of any kind
this beautiful world and the people that we share the world with
prayer
peace
lavendar
peppermint
pretty stationary and pens
new journals
reading old journals
cherishing memories of college
sitting in the gazebo reading a good book on a sunny day or on a rainy day, both types of weather are good to be in the gazebo in
first snow of the year - if we get any in Georgia at all
looking at clouds float by
looking at the night sky full of twinkling stars

This list could be much longer, I will think of other things to add within the next few days and want to add more. I can't wait to read what everyone else has written.

This is the last Pink Thoughts, thank you Christina for creating such a positive idea to get awareness out, and to help support others.
A few days ago this was the quote on my calendar, "Silently time passes. The only life I have submits to its power." Hatsui Shizue This made me really think and it is so true, we have one life and it should be lived to the fullest. Many times people don't seem fully awake to themselves and living the life that takes their breath away until they are given a time limiting prognosis. We must continue to work together for everyone that is effected and will ever be effected by cancer. WIth joint efforts and renewed and continued positive thinking there will be a cure.

I absolutely love this time of the year. The crispness of Fall, the beautiful colors that pop and come alive with color. With Autumn we see nature's true colors. It fills me with hope. With the feeling of hope I am overwhelmed with pink thoughts to show support of cancer prevention and research, as more and more people become survivors of cancer.

Today I woke up and was exhilarated with life. I think of all the wonderful aspects of my life that I have been so blessed to have experienced and will continue to experience. Life is an adventure. The season of Autumn reminds me of the adventure of life and takes my breath away with it's beauty. With the vibrant colors on the trees, to the brilliant azure blue sky, and the bite to the chilly mornings I am reminded that life is beautiful and meant to be lived fully. I am also reminded of the courage of so many people who are living with breast cancer and all forms of cancer. With these people there is a beauty in their fight to find cures and for life. As I woke up this morning with my windows open to let in the chill of Autumn's breeze, snuggled in my blankets I heard a train whistle in the distance. One box car does not make a train's noise, one engine does not make a train's roar, but with all the box cars and the engine the train roars down the track. I am reminded of all the people who daily gather together to blaze down the track to find cures for breast cancer and the courageous roar of people living with the disease. Let's all roar!

Train roars
Echoing across
Still quiet Autumn,
Dawn breaking
Into nature's noise,
Train whistle creates
Man made chaos.

The train poem has nothing to do with cancer but I created it when I first woke up this morning and wanted to share that too.

I am thinking pink thoughts today. My dear friend Christina, at Soul Aperture, http://soulaperture.blogspot.com/2009/09/wont-you-join-me-please.html is hosting wonderful pink thoughts for breast cancer awareness month. We all know so many people affected by cancer. We know many people who are survivors of it also. Those survivors give us hope. I often wonder what separates those living remission cancer free after having it and those who have with cancer, which then eventually take their lives. I have met this wonderful writer in the blog world, her name is Susie Hemingway and she is over at A Power Within blog: http://susiehemingway.blogspot.com/. Her husband is living with cancer now and she celebrates the love that they share with one another and it is so very beautiful. With people like Christina and Susie who have positive thoughts and the added power of love there will be a cure. So I will continue to pray everyday for a cure and that everyone may live in peace, light, and love.

Sun shines crisp
On scattered rose petals,
Brittle leaves, and dew
That rests on the early
Morning Earth
There is love for the
Freshness of another day.

On this rainy Saturday I have taken time to do the things I love. I have had a slow day, where I take the time to enjoy myself completely. As I was working on writing a story, listening to Natasha Beddingfield music, in the quite moments listening to the rain on the windows, and leaves, my kitten, Mocha, playing at my feet, and napping on my bed, I was so joyful. Today was filled with happiness, that nourished and fed my soul and creativity. Bliss!

Scattered red petals
Stain green grass which
Is slowly fading to brown
Pungent spicy smell
Of freshly cut grass
Tickles my nose
Clouds move across
The sky like ocean
Waves
Every blade of grass
Standing at attention
Swaying in the breeze
Fiery brilliance
Radiance of
Autumn to come.

I catch a glimpse
Of myself in the mirror
As I pass, seeing
My flushed face,
Hair tucked behind
My ear, silver
Glimmer of earring
On a pale ear, surrounded
By dark damp curls
After a hard workout
Look, feeling an appreciation
Of self to the
Core of my being.

There is a sleeping bear
Hibernating, lying in it's
Lair inside each of us.
It is time to awaken
The bear of creativity
To emerge from shadown
Into light, letting all
Ablaze in the fire
Of the amazing soul
Belonging to self and
All humanity.

During an afternoon walk,
I spent the last few minutes
Gathering leaves from the
Wooded path, already
Painted by Autumn's
Vibrant hand,
The rain scented wind
Laced with a slight
Chill, Fall is around
The corner waiting to
Make her grand entrance
With bold, wild colors.

It has been a whirl wind week with getting back into the classroom, meeting my new students, therefore, this weekend I took some time for myself. This time has given me breathing space to come back tomorrow recharged for the challenges and wonderful happy times that lay ahead of me this week.

Friday evening I went for my daily walk at the park. I made a commitment to myself to walk for my health, daily; almost two months ago I began to walk at the park, making it something to get through. I wasn't used to the hills I had to trudge or other terrain. Now I am walking up to 35 minutes daily and find that it is a respite from daily endeavors, an activity I look forward to and not just something I get through. I walk at a pretty quick pace but at the same time engage all my senses to my surroundings. I find that I come into an acute awareness of the environment at that time. The walks I take allows for time in a busy day to find quiet solitude.

During this time I clear my mind. The endless thoughts circling in my mind cease. I first concentrate on my breath, footsteps, feeling the ground beneath my feet. Once it is only the breath and foot fall, then I expand to feel the breeze on my face, blowing my hair, the sound of traffic, birds flying overhead or sitting in a tree singing it's beautiful melody, children on the playground playing, hearing their laughter, squeals of delight, or the tired fussy child who wants to go home, the little league football teams playing and practicing, the loud cheers of parents, coaches yelling encouragement, or demanding the children play better, to get it together. I also hear water splashing from the indoor pool, shrieks from swimmers, the smell of chlorine, laced, mixed, and mingled with the smell of pine trees, flowers, the small rose garden, the scent of different people as they pass me on the trail. Also I tune into the fading sunlight as it penetrates the canopy of trees that I am under, light dancing on the path. Simultaneously I am aware of what is going on with me, my body, and inside of me. I know when I must push myself, picking up speed, the feel of my heart pumping nourishing blood through my body, the tingle and burn I feel in my legs, from ankle to thigh. Every one of my senses accosted while I am in tune to the whole of it. During and after my walks I am blissed out.

When I'm finished, I drive back to my house, go to the gazebo with my journal to write. Combining the quiet solitude of the walk and time in the gazebo, all the while surrounded by beautiful nature, thoughts pour out of me. During those times I have listened to the voice within myself.

In the quiet, a phrase keeps coming to me: Living Whole Heart and Soul. At first I was just given the thought of Living Whole. I began to think about what living whole means. What does living whole mean to me, in my life? Living Whole in my mind has now evolved to Living Whole Heart and Soul. Right now in my life I know living whole heart and soul means engaging in things that nourish me from the inside and outside. Quiet time daily seems to effect even the most smallest aspects of my life. I feel as if something is missing if I have not had quiet time during the day. It is elusive at first then I think well I haven't spent time really listening to the silence today, whether that turns into daily prayer, meditation, or just sitting with the silence. Daily exercise of my body engages and helps my whole being. I know that abiding by an organic, vegetarian way of life also nourishes me. I have moved closer to veganism and a raw diet that is low in sodium, carbs, and cholesterol. I feel as if I have more energy and vitality when eating this way. Daily prayer, meditation, and visualization also enriches my way of life. I read daily also. Along with this, writing in any form, occasionally painting and drawing, lets my creative side speak. To balance all the solitary activities I also find time to socialize with family and friends. I also know that growing up an only child makes it easier for me to relish in solitary quiet time and that some social situations make me withdraw, overwhelm me, and wish for smaller groups of people. Laughter is my daily dose of medicine.

This idea: Living Whole Heart and Soul has anchored in me, resonates within me in a deep place. This idea is taking flight and feeding my creative ideas that are flowing.

The vacation to the beach was fun. I had a good time there. I am in constant awe of Mother Nature and the beauty that surrounds us daily. Nature is a gift given to us from God, a vision of miracles that only He could create.

While on vacation there was a balance of resting on the beach in the sunlight reading, writing, and walking, along with going out to see history that surrounds the area of St. Augustine. I went to the Spanish Market that is filled with restaurants, art galleries, boutiques, folk art shops. It was fantastic there. I went to a couple of cathedrals there which were breath taking beautiful. I also wrote a few poems while at the beach:

My hair combed
By the wind, scented
With salt of the sea

___________________________

Sand bar full of
Shells, thrown up from
Seas' inside, born to the
Sun from darkness to light
Like the lotus
Leaves the mud and muck
To emerge into sunlight
Watching day born from night
___________________________


Ocean
Wild
A mind of it's own
Free thinker
Reacts on every whim
___________________________

It was refreshing to walk on the beach, sand beneath and between my toes, the cold water lapping at my feet, the sun warming my body.

Christina at Soul Aperture http://soulaperture.blogspot.com/ is hosting the simple things that make us happy on July 8th. I am posting early. Thank you Christina for your constant inspiration, it means the world to me.

All the simple things that bring joy, add to a monumental thing called life. I love that life is made up of all the simple things that bring pleasure and joy. I am loving the extra time that I am getting to spend reading in the gazebo. The gazebo is surrounded by flowers in full bloom, trees, bird feeders with a large amount of birds and squirrels visiting. I love to be in nature, watching the sunset with all of my senses engaged to the world around me. I love every evening sitting in nature reading, contemplating, and sharing some time with a stray cat that I have been feeding for several weeks now. She is a black and white tuxedo cat and she will sit in the grass in the fading sun while I read, she naps, stretches lazily, naps again, but at the same time she seems to be keenly aware of everything going on around her. I am abundantly thankful for the precious, fun life I have been given.

This morning my alarm clock was the sun tickling my face softly with it's warm rays as I slowly woke up, smiling. I love waking up naturally like this. I lay in bed watching the tree limbs laden with green leaves sway in the breeze making sunlight dance across the ceiling and walls. Then after I was fully awake I had some cereal with soy milk, a half cup of blueberries, and a banana. I ate this while writing in my journal and listening to the WAH! cd. I feel a balance in my life that I want to sustain not just while I am off from work, but maintain this in the long term. This balance, cohesion, and synchronicity comes from my core, the core of my being - I can feel it that strongly. I feel anchored and grounded yet I feel a vibrant flow coursing through me. I love this feeling. This balance is not temporary, I am not limiting myself, this will be a lasting aspect of my life. I am abundantly thankful.

Yesterday I thought endlessly of my elderly cousin who is now in her mid 80s. She talks about the past, her past, a lot, almost living there and it makes me sad. I can't define the sadness, if it is for her because she is stuck there, or if thinking that one day that could be me sitting there talking about the glory days of the past, my past, when I'm well into my 80 years of life. Anyway, I had to purge these thoughts out in this poem.

She gazes at her
Gnarled past sitting
On the table; quick glances
Is all she can take, steal;
She used to think of it
As a ribbon, stretched out, smooth,
Thrown carelessly onto
A surface, curves and
Elegant folds, twists
After decades now she
Sees rough knots curled
Onto one another
Zigzag roads end abruptly
Only to eventually begin again
Then just in another direction
Others long, drawn out
Then giving way to a different path
Knobby contorted choices made,
Decisions led back to its source
Herself.

Thank you Christina, at Soul Aperture, http://soulaperture.blogspot.com/ for your wonderful idea of posting what makes us happy and grateful. There are so many things that make me happy and grateful. As I was writing and thinking about this topic I noticed that most of the things that make me happy are non material items. I love that and want to make sure that I live my life more from my heart and soul, rather than a materialistic aspect. I look forward to reading every one's ideas.
I am happy and grateful for:

this glorious life I have been given to live

God

parents

friends - L, R, M, C, J, G, J, R

memories of my cat, Maya, who passed a few months back

writing poetry

writing short stories

reading

praying

authenticity

honesty/truth

meditating

art

talks on the phone with friends late into the night (haven't done this in a long time, but still love it)

laughing and laughter

listening to music - I'm really loving Natasha Beddingfield, Wah!, Norah Jones, some other Sanskrit cds, Cold Play, the list could go on and on about the music that makes me happy

teaching 5 year old children

children

laughter of children and their carefree spirits and ideas

laughing

soy peppermint mochas and hazelnut lattes

reading on a rainy day

reading in the sunshine

everyday in nature

sitting in the gazebo watching the sunset

hearing bird's song

watching birds fly, soaring free in the blue sky

feeling the breeze on my face

feeling the sun warm my face

sitting in a window when it is a winter day with the sun warming me

hot chocolate

walking barefoot in the grass

feeling the dew on my bare feet

sand on bare feet

the beach

painting

painting a canvas full of vibrant colors

dancing

chai tea

in bookstores, finding a comfy seat, a good book, and good latte

autumn/fall

Sunday afternoons

soup

Rumi poems

the mountains

staying up late

sleeping late

curling up with a good book or my journal in a blanket on a rainy, cool day

walking in nature

Mexican food, any food that is hot, salty, and spicy

peaches, pears, clementines

going to parks and walking the wooded trails, being in nature

sitting in my gazebo at dusk in the summer with candles going, their scent mixing with the scent of nature is yummy

learning new things daily

open to new possibilities and experiences that expand horizons

traveling on the path, the journey of my life, embracing all that comes my way

smiling

sunlight glittering off the green leaves of spring and summer

antique browsing and antique shopping, knowing each object has a history - interesting and intriguing

delving into getting to know myself daily, this is an ongoing process that never ceases

popcorn, chips, and salsa

animals

architecture

old houses

gardens and botanical gardens

the scent Warm Vanilla Sugar from Bath and Body Works

Japanese maple trees, especially in the fall

flowers: especially lilies - bright fiery orange lilies, lotus, jonquils, buttercups, daisies, sunflowers, and jasmine

the scent of lavender

Vincent Van Gogh's paintings

Italian Renaissance art and architecture

apricot jam

the smell of rain

smell of burning leaves in the autumn

stationary, pens, pencils, crayons, that new smell of them all

hearing children read for the first time, stringing slowly that first sentence, connecting it then realizing they have read, so rewarding

manicures and pedicures

horses

optimistic people

jazz music of the 1920s, 1930s, and 1940s, the flapper era - I think that is a time when a lot of people found their creative nature and let those talents shine - a very carefree bohemian time in history

From making this list of the things that make me happy, I find it is the simple things that do bring me happiness and joy. Once we know our true nature, what makes our heart's sing with happiness and joy, our true self, our true heart and soul, what lies in us that surpasses, our body, mind, emotions, feelings, in finding the essence of who we are, this will allow us to have lasting happiness and ultimate joy.

Love, peace, joy, light, happiness, and truth to all!

Out of the cosmic
Womb of God
Is birthed
Light and love,
Peace and compassion -
From God, creator
Of all things

In the womb of
Creativity
We soar
Out of the
Light of
God's cosmic
Creation,
His body of
Word and knowledge

After a hard workout,
Blood pumping vibrantly
Hot through my veins,
Sweat coating my face
I smile and feel
Gratefully alive
Filled with joy

I invited the night
Full of stars
To dance through
My window
Serenading me
With the first
Song of insects
All senses accosted
As I smell
The burst
Of flower's
Bloom
Tasting it's
Sweet nectar
On my lips

Every day is fantastic, but I had an especially marvelous day yesterday, actually an overall marvelous weekend. I usually don't use the word marvelous, but the day was just that. There is nothing like spending time outside in nature! My mother and I planted banana pepper plants that will give us peppers in about 6-8 weeks. Having my hands in the dirt, digging, planting, watering the newly planted peppers and other flowers, being accousted by all of nature was intoxicating. Every year around this time there is also a jazz festival in our town. I live close to the downtown area so I could hear the jazz music while I planted. The sun was glistening off freshly green leaves of trees, the grass shimmered, swayed, and danced in the spring breeze. The only way I could describe my day in the sun, in nature, working with the flowers and plants was that I was blissed out last night. I could not focus on anything I was so light headed, dreamy, peaceful, full of love, happiness, peace, and compassion, and one with myself. I felt the fusion of my mind, body, and spirit.

When I felt this melding of mind, body, heart, soul, spirit, I thought again of how we are always whole, always connected to one another, connected to all living things, to all things, but there are only glimpses in which we recognize this truth. I want to hold onto the knowing, the truth of this, cherish this knowledge, revere, and respect, it, hold it gently to my heart, then release, sending it out to everyone. When I think of this, I have a vision of myself capturing something like star dust, cupping it in my hand, then blowing, seeing the star dust, float on the breeze, spreading to everything, scattering peace, love, and compassion.

Thank you so much Amber at Sweatpea's Corner blog: http://sweetpeazcorner.blogspot.com/ This is such a pretty award and such an honor to be recognized.

Day 16, 17, and 18 of the 37 Day Challenge:
Yesterday I finished reading The Pull of the Moon by Elizabeth Berg. This was a truly wonderful book to read. The woman in the novel, Nan, ran away from home at the age of 50. She decided to take a road trip by herself, without her husband of 25 years, without her daughter who was in college, and without any friends, she just took this trip on her own for a few weeks. Some parts of the book are absolutely breath taking. Berg writes with a true, authentic voice, says what many people may think, have thought, and experienced. She says at one point in a letter to her husband about her trip, "I know my own luck. I know how rare it is for a person to be able to do this. And I know more and more what I'm doing it for. I feel a kind of strength starting to happen that is wholly legitimate, that is not some trapping I wear until it falls off. It is as though the thing has roots, and seeks the sun with its face turned toward it. And I know I never would have found it without leaving." I think that people can do little things for themselves daily so they do not take such a drastic measure as to go on a road trip by themselves for almost a month like Nan in the novel did. Sometimes we have to leave ourselves to find our own true authentic self. When I'm in nature, write, paint, read, teach, help others, I come out of myself and leave "me" behind, and in that I find myself.

Days 13, 14, 15 of the 37 Day Challenge:
On Monday and Tuesday it snowed, so Wednesday through today, we have had typical early spring weather. I have been out and about enjoying these gorgeous days, whether it was sitting in the window seat on windy chilly Wednesday at Borders, drinking a hot chai tea, writing, driving to the lake to look at spring flourishing all around me, sitting in the gazebo in my backyard in the evening, or antique shopping yesterday, and afterward eating at the Varsity. Being in nature is a balm for my soul. I have been graciously waking with a smile on my face each and every morning as the sun wakes me. Also I have been writing a poem a day. This is the poem from yesterday:

I hunger for the
Sunlight of Spring
To spread itself
Endlessly
From sunrise -
To twilight
With the glorious
Sounds of birdsong,
Wind whispering
It's rustle through
New greenery, hearing
The pop as flowers
Bloom into raucous
Vibrant colors
A beauty only
God could create

Day 12 of the 37 Day Challenge:
Today on April 7th it is snowing in Georgia. It is gorgeous here. The wind is blowing too hard for the snow to accumulate, but it is beautiful flying around. So I am in a happy, peaceful place right now, drinking mocha, listening to WAH!, watching the snow fall, reading, writing.

Day 11 of 37 Day Challenge:
I went with my family to the mountains for the day. This is a place that my parents took me as a child; the first time we went on a family vacation was when I was three years old. I traveled with them the same roads we had taken many times before to this place that holds so many memories for me. At one point yesterday we walked beside the river with snowflakes sticking lightly in our hair and misting our face. It was a beautiful day which I am thankful for.

Day 10 Sunday:

I could wake
Everyday to
Sunlight
Flooding through
My bedroom
Windows
Caressing me
With warmth

Day 9 Saturday:
My writing is changing. I've had this feeling for about six or seven months now. I don't see myself as rigid as I used to be in my writing. There is a revolution in writing, a new freedom, but it is elusive and I can't quiet define what has changed in it, other than it is different, and I feel great about this. So this is a poem where I am trying to figure out what is going on with it.

I started wandering
With words,
Not a metaphor,
Or similie,
Something in between
Without definition
Uniting of truth
Creating simplicity
A wonderful way
To write and live
A life comfortably.

Day 8 Friday:

Spring makes
Me hungry
For the youth
Of my early twenties
Nostalgia
Sweet and bitter
Like the pungent
Scent of flowers
In bloom
Not able to hide
Their vibrant
Brilliant colors,
Splashes of hues that
Delight the senses,
Obscures inner beauty
That slowly grows into
It's own and emerges.

Day 7:
It was a sleepy rainy night and this morning I pressed my snooze button on the alarm clock three times. I did this because I want to wake up with a smile on my face before I get out of bed. By the third time I was ready to stretch my arms above my head and smile as I hopped out of bed to start my day. This is the poem I worked on:

I invited the night
Full of stars
To dance through
My bedroom window,
Serenading me
With the first
Song of a new season
A buzz of
Insects;
All senses accosted
As I smelled
The burst
Of flower's
Bloom
Tasting it's
Sweet nectar
On my lips.

Yesterday, for day 5 of the 37 day challenge, I did write in my journal, but did not make it to post. I also woke up with a smile on my face, thankful for the new day that God had blessed me.
This is the poem that I wrote yesterday; it is short, sweet, to the point:

Dying embers of the
Setting sun reflect
A change in season.


Today, on day 6, I woke up to the sound of rain drizzling on my roof and windows and honestly snuggled back down into the blankets to get warm to sleep an extra few minutes. Five minutes later when the clock went off, I smiled turning it off, thankful for the five extra minutes of being in my cocoon warmth of bed sleeping, then I smiled again as my feet hit the floor. I was eagerly ready to start my day with a smile.

I am thinking today of one thought that kept surfacing throughout the day. The thought needled me, calling for my attention. The thought is this: People create life stories for themselves and about themselves, and this becomes their prison. Free yourself. I don't know if this thought was meant specifically for myself or in general for others. It has captured my attention and I will give it more thought. I am in the process of shedding some old thought patterns, beliefs and expanding myself. Life is a learning process, to continually learn and expand. This is one of life's greatest gifts - limitless potential.

Today is day four of the 37 day "challenge." This morning, the clock sounded like a screeching siren as it woke me up from peaceful sleep, but before my feet hit the floor I had a huge smile on my face. The poem I wrote today:

Over six billion
Voices speak
The same language
Which is love
We are not
Misunderstood

This morning I woke up, then smiled as I heard the birds chirping, and felt the cool breeze with the scent of rain coming in through the window. I felt grateful, vibrant, happy, and fully alive first thing in the morning, no grumpiness at all. I walked with my eyes wide open into the kitchen to get mocha, then settled in to write in my journal. This is the third morning I have woke up immediately smiling as my eyes were brightened by the light of day. Thank You God for the day I have been given.

I feel the tide of my emotions
Roll in and out
Like waves moving through me
Sometimes fierce, sometimes a gentle lull
Continuous, fluid, always in motion;
But, I always find calm and peace
Within my soul

Yesterday I began the 37 day challenge which is inspired by Patti Digh. Beginning day two, I realize I am going to add to this list and continue to see what works for me, what makes my heart and soul sing and soar, and other things that I should slough away and get rid of so I can feel light, free, peaceful, and in love with the world. I think with such positive feelings there are more positive changes that can happen in the world making it filled with peace, love, compassion, and happiness.

I plan on writing daily. I love to write but it is not something that I practice every day. When I write there is nothing else but the feel of the paper, pen, the thoughts, but yet my environment and surroundings are enhanced: the sun shines more brightly, reflecting off the newly light green leaves on trees, the breeze blows gently caressing my skin, the smell of freshly bloomed flowers smell more sweetly.

I am not a morning person. When I first wake up I am a grump. I will wake up daily with a smile on my face greeting the gift of a new day and reverence of this moment. This will set the tone of the day and open my heart to living in gratitude, being thankful.

These are the two main areas of focus right now. Thank you Patti for your inspiration.

This is a wonderful quote by Su Tung-Po' I had on my calendar this morning when I turned the page to a new day. It sent a calm, focused feeling straight through me that carried me through the day.

"Strike your own evening drum, morning bell,
then shut the door.
Lamp burning low by a solitary pillow;
gray ashes where just now you stirred
the stove to red.
Lie and listen to raindrops splattering the
window."
Su Tung-Po'

We are memory gatherers
Collecting experiences
To help define our
Future selves
When all we
Truly need is
This moment
Then, let it go
Nothing defines
Us but
True Spirit
Of God in our
Soul
Unguarded

Creativity is fickle. I am finally used to inspiration flowing to me easily at times while other times are very stagnant and non productive. There are the ups and downs, ebbs and flows to every aspect of life. I am grateful, feel happier, and better, when creativity flows through my veins red, hot, and fiery. It is a cycle and I truly believe that I need the coolness of creativity's hibernation to set in before I can fully take on inspiration's power again, thus creating.
With the sudden burst of spring like weather this week I have felt a rekindling of my creative spirit emerging with the first green sprouts of spring. Then today is rainy and cold again, but I keep in mind there must be rain in order to nourish the vibrant colors of flowers, trees, and life. These are three separate poems.

When in a loud crowd
I often wish for a solitary
Moment of quiet time with
My books, journal, canvas,
And paints.
In the stillness
That is when
I can hear creativity's
Urgent whisper inspiring me.
______________________________________
Shards of light
Shine through
Spaces between
Black limbs,
Reflecting golden
Off waxy green
Magnolia leaves
______________________________________
Complexity of
Nature's beauty
Takes my breath
Away
Filling me with
A yearning for
Spring in full bloom
______________________________________
A silver moon
Casts it's changing
Light on a blue, black
River, illuminating
Life underneath
Darting, playful life

I hold my hands folded
Around a mug of steaming
Tea like a life perserver
Keeping me afloat
As the tears cascade
Down my face like
The rain outside my
Window,
I feel cleansed,
Clarity surfaces
In many forms,
I feel cleansed.

Train Brain

As I was reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, recommended by a great friend, I had this aha! moment where something inside me clicked making sense. I am reading the book slowly, taking it all in, digesting. This is truly one of the best books I have read, so profound, thought provoking, and inspirational. The book inspires me to apply these concepts to my own life.

Tolle says that we are not our mind, thoughts, and emotions. We can be the observer of these aspects of ourselves, which creates a gap where we can see the essence of who we are, vast and whole. After I read this section, I sat for a long while observing my thoughts as they went around and around. Some people say as they observe their thoughts it is as if the thoughts are on clouds floating by or bubbles, but my thoughts race, as I'm sure that many other's do also. I saw my thoughts as a train racing by. When I identify with my thoughts I get in the engine of the train, then the thought is linked to another thought, so I go to the next car in the train, then the next. At the end is the caboose, but my thoughts don't stop there because there is an engine of another train right behind, so I hop on that one too. These thoughts keep going and going. I visually stepped off the train onto a platform beside the train. At that point I was the observer of these thoughts and not identifying with them, therefore emotions were not attached to the thoughts. The train just passed right on by with the thoughts and I did not get caught up in them at all.

I am now trying to be conscious of my train brain. When I catch myself on the train brain I get off the train, disengage, then watch with non attachment as the train, with thoughts, passes me by. When I step off the train brain I do not fade into nothingness instead I emerge into the sunlight, free.

There are the first few twinges of Spring to air right now. When those first signs begin to show themselves then Spring fever errupts. I love the scent outside during this time of year, the scent of hope. Before our eyes we will see Spring blooming in full, vibrant color.

At the library on Sunday when I was browsing the mystery section, a man who was about eighty years old came over to the woman behind the desk. He began to talk to her and one of the first things he said as he made small talk was commenting on the weather. He was giddy with the sudden warm weather and said on his drive over to the library he got spring fever. Everyone was smiling because the man said what everyone was thinking. There is a happiness, love, peace, vibrancy, and hope about the first buds of spring, sprouting to beginnings that touches a part of each and every person. Maybe it is touching the youth, the child, in all of us that still lingers wanting to be set free again, to run down green hillsides with a kite blowing in the wind, hearing the whistle of a distant train getting closer in the first of Spring's warm breezes.

Sitting out in nature I was listening to the world and this is the poem I worked on.

There is something
About a train's
Whistle as it
Echoes out over
The late winter
Silence that makes
Me yearn for Spring's
Warm embrace.

This week has been so busy. There were times when I was rushed and caught up in the moment, going through the motion trying to get everything finished. Mid week I stopped when I had a few minutes at work alone. As I sat there to catch my breath I realized there is absolutely nothing to stress about. I rummaged through my purse looking for a piece of gum and instead I found a sticky note with quotes on them that I had scribbled during my last trip to Borders for mocha and good reads. These are the quotes that definitely put my mind in bliss mode and brought me back to the present where I should always stay, fully in the present because that is all we are given.

All quotes by Sri Swami Satchidananda
"The fact is, nothing outside you changes, you see only what you choose to see, your world reflects you."

"Life is a play. It was never meant to be a serious heavy thing, our own ego makes it that way. God just wanted to have some fun. That's why He created all of us."

"Happiness is our natural state when we are not doing unhappiness. Happy is what we are, unhappiness is what we do. Who would I be without my unhappiness?"

"Happiness is not dependent on circumstance. Happiness means meeting life as it is and not believeing our judgements and stories about how it should be"

I have been very introspective lately. I have been thinking, losing myself, finding myself as I notice the twinkling shine of Venus so close to the moon, two other stars' milky light in the southern half of the sky ascending higher, moving north west slowly. Then the winter morning, bright and silky, fresh, starting anew. Then as I walked outside, the chilly wind hit me, but it was refreshing, cleansing, as I listened to the wind chimes jingle and the iron sun, moon, star and beaded blue and red sun catcher dazzled beautifully capturing my attention.

The quote in my calendar for today says, "The startling reality of things is my discovery every single day," by Fernando Pessoa. There is a crispness and clarity that winter reality brings.

Only half poems have been running around in my head the last few days, not coherent whole poems, just lines, half lines that are my fluttering thoughts and feelings. But now looking at them, all of these could be combined into one poem.

Barren trees,
Their limbs as black
As midnight
Look like roots
Piercing the dusky
Sky,
Winter wind
Whispers quietly
Through these trees
As they stand tall
In the chill.

I am thankful for this day!

I don't remember
What my face
Looked like before
Tiny thin crows
Feet began to
Faintly form
Around my eyes
And laugh lines
Around my mouth
Forming a paranthesis
Both of which were
Caused by laughing a lot
But I'm proud
Of these spider web
Wrinkles that will
Deepen over time.

The first day of the new year! It is amazing how turning the page of a calendar can change people's mind set but at the beginning of each new year there is a renewed sense of enthuasiam . Every day is a miracle! Each new year, month, week, day, minute, and second brings new hopes, dreams, and possibilities. It is as if there is a clean blank slate waiting to be painted; bold colorful images appear as we live our life to the fullest. One way I live my life to the fullest is by expressing myself creatively, whether drawing, painting, or writing. Writing is an immediate way for me to make sense of my life and give situations meaning. Writing is my love and my passion.

I have always tried to be creative in some way every day. It is a freeing experience to come outside of yourself and display what is inside. I can even remember as a young child working on expressing myself creatively. Before going to school I spent my time watercolor painting each and every day. When I asked, my mom would help me get water in a cup, my brushes, paints, and the paper out. I would sit at our kitchen table and paint for an hour or longer, sometimes I would even go outside and paint in nature. I was so content in my own little painting world.

Then when I five years old, in kindergarten, my first school experience, we were given coloring sheets with scenes, characters, and objects on them and we were expected to color inside the lines neatly. I did not want to color inside the lines on the coloring sheets - before school I had been given free expression before with crisp white pieces of paper to create my own figures, characters, scenes and still craved that freedom. So I would scribble all across the front of the coloring paper and turn it to the back to draw and color my own picture. My teacher would walk by and tell me that I should take my time and color neatly. I resented her greatly. Many days at school I sat out in the warm sunshine watching my friends play as I colored my trees purple, the sky pink, the grass orange, and well ok the sun could be happy yellow. Of course then I was told that the trees were green unless in autumn, the sky was blue, the grass green, and then she said slyly that I colored the sun the right color. After she had told me the "correct" colors for everything I can clearly remember telling her that she had just said to color inside the lines, but not with any specific color. In that class I was not free to express my self and neither were the other children. I was miserable.

Once this same teacher passed each child a handful of craft sticks to create something. So we were just given the sticks and not told exactly what to create but to make anything. I intently began to put together my structure. When the time was up she began to collect each of our creations and put them on another table to dry. She came to each child taking their assembled craft, making positive comments to each of them. I was still busy putting my finishing touches on mine. She came to me, looked down in horror at my craft and with a small sarcastic laugh said, "you used too much glue, it's a mess, and what is it?!" I looked at her with wide eyes and asked if she did not like my abstract art work. She looked as shocked as I did, whether it was from my comment or from my creation, also whether she thought I was a smart ass or if I was really asking her, I still don't know. Which I promise I was truly asking her if she liked it or not. I slowly looked around at the other craft stick creations: houses, stars, fences, even a couple of flowers. I sat there with my face growing red and hot as I thought my art work was not good enough, not like everyone else's art.

I could not wait to get out of that class! As the year ended I was relieved. That fall I entered first grade and had the most wonderful teacher ever. She was nurturing to all the students in the class and we were learning to read, add, and subtract, we did not have much time for coloring. I loved first grade! I still keep in touch with my first grade teacher.

I think that it is ironic that I now teach kindergarten. I am sensitive to the small fragile personalities that are just beginning to blossom in my students. If a student can not truly color inside the lines or form their letters I work with them on fine motor skills to help them develop this ablitity. I don't ridicule them, I simply work with them, giving them space; they make small steps over and over again which in the end produces great growth and confidence in the student.

I will work each and every day to live my life in a freely creative way, which then puts me in sync and rhythm in other areas of my life. Also I see that my experience in kindergarten, when I was five years old, had to happen because if not I may not be a teacher and I may not be sensitive to other people's creative pursuits, or thankful for my own. I charged on painting, drawing, and writing, always listening to my own creative heart and soul. May everyone live in pursuit of the things that bring them happiness!